Dave’s Blog Sucks

End cuts

2011-05-17T18:49:00.002-04:00

Hi all. Wow seems to have been, um, five years since I've posted. Wow I'll have to watch that. Time gets away. Anyhow I thought I'd jot down a few things and see if anybody still reads. Probably not, but I just discovered this old blog a few days ago and I was amazed to find that I'd totally forgotten about it.

Why do we blog?

I don't know why anybody else does, but I know that sometimes I get a small rush from seeing words that I've written that sounds like somebody with something approaching intelligence produced it. Approaching.

Oh I was going to tell you about end cuts. Hey before I get into that, isn't it interesting that these days, Facebook and Twitter are so a part of our lives? I was just about to get to the point when I realized how similar blogging is to simple updates on social network sites. Wild how time flies. I think when we were still doing Chub Creek there was no such thing as either, or if there was it wasn't for long.

Anyway, about end cuts. They're awesome. If you can stomach the crappy way the look they are a really great bargain and sometimes real tasty. I just got some goat cheese rolled in blueberries and it's pretty damned good.

That's all I had to say.

Cheers!

Dave

Chubby Chat

2006-11-29T20:02:00.000-05:00

CHUBBY CHAT UPDATE

Unfortunately, Frappr has discontinued the frappr chat feature until further notice. In the meantime, I've found a cool free chat service, that I'll be making a link to on the website (on Friday when it comes live again)

Here's the link if you want to try it. (I'll be hanging out there for a while like a loser)

http://pub31.bravenet.com/chat/show.php?usernum=2605005000&cpv=2

Dave

No Show Jones

2006-11-26T16:26:00.000-05:00

Sorry if you were wondering, the site is down again, and because of that there will be no show this week. The good news is the site will be back up on Dec 1st (Friday) and even better, it should never go down again because I've found a way to host the files for free. Curious about this? visit ourmedia.org and download the free "spinXpress2" for quick uploading. A bit confusing to get into, but once done the initial setup it's pretty brainless.

If you'd like to test the download speed, try downloading this file (an enhanced version of episode 58 with a built in slide show if you view it in iTunes, a video iPod, or a current version of Quicktime) I get about 55 megawhatsits per second when I download it, and for free, I think that's plenty.

Chub Creek down

2006-11-13T18:34:00.000-05:00

If you're looking for the current show, you'll find the website down due to heavy bandwidth usage. I've still not found a solution to that problem but I'm looking. For this show, Big Jake has kindly offered to host the show on his server temporarily (the site will be back up on the 15th) Click the link below to download:

(Iv'e taken the link down now. Thanks Jake!)

Intel outside

2006-10-29T00:05:00.000-04:00

Yes I know. I love Macs so much, but I keep getting the lemons. My new Intel iMac started behaving funny on Friday night. Friday night. Of course Friday night. That's the night when you just want to think about nothing, watch a stupid movie and flake out. But I couldn't because my beautiful new computer was acting funny.

It was frozen; something that just doesn't happen to Macs anymore. Sometimes a program might get into a loop and hang itself, but you can always force quit and everything is fine. This time it was frozen solid. Nothing was happening and I couldnt force out of it. So I restarted, and I could hear the sickening "click....click..." sound of a dying hard disk, and a grey screen.

After about an hour of (actually very funny) conversation with a Mac Support specialist named Sasha, I came to realize I had only one option left, and that was to try to reformat the disk. I thought long and hard before I even attempted this, but finally had to admit my drive was not recoverable. But even when I tried to format it it just clicked and clicked. The drive was dead.

What was most painful was that long after transferring all my files to the newer iMac, I had just begun erasing things from the old computer, feeling pretty confident everything would be fine with the new machine for the time being. What a mistake. So much has been lost now that I don't really want to think about it. Among other things, the working files for the new music website, and for the dink dolls site. I'll likely have to build some of it from scratch, if not all. I'm not sure what I still have on the old (and also malfunctioning) iMac. But I think I'll be able to get something.

So I gave up on recovery, and took the machine in to the Apple store in the big mall a few miles away. Its a cool store, and of course, as I was talking to the chipper "Mac Genius" at the "Genius Bar" the conversation moved to the new Mac Books. It's the new portable machine with Intel chips. Blazing fast, beautiful, and equipped with a built in video camera for chatting, and a remote control for movie or music enjoyment from a distance. And of course, it comes with all that cool Mac software.

I think it was my sense of loss that did it, but yes, I bought the new Mac Book. I needed to retire my old portable anyway, and even though it still functions very well, I'll really love being able to do real work and not be stuck to my desk. The old portable was really only good for surfing and emails. But the new one is good for just about anything. I can even rig this thing to do pocasting and graphics without much trouble, and then I'd have a nice backup for anything that goes wrong in the future. Nothing had better ever go wrong in my whole lifetime of Mac use, by the way.

So the sick computer will have a nice new hard drive come next weekend, all on Apple's dime (I should think so, huh.) and they even tell me they'll likely fix my older iMac for free, because it was a well documented problem they had with power supplies on that model. So that's good. Soon I'll be swimming in Macs again, and that will make me happy.

Happy Halloween.

(this may be the geekiest post I've ever written)

Unidentified Flying Oranges

2006-10-19T21:15:00.000-04:00

Before I begin this let me say that I have no scientific credentials whatsoever, and you should take this entire entry with a grain of... sugar. But if you know me, you can trust that I've read enough to feel pretty confident with what I'm saying here.

So here's my question: if the universe is so huge and teeming with stars and planets... where are the UFO visitors?

Some would say "they're visiting us right now, what about the UFO sightings?"

Okay here's where the grain of sugar comes in, and with it, my answer: Whatever they are they're not from another planet. They are something else, maybe. But not from another planet. No way.

Here is why I think so. It's not anything new, but I defy you to brush it off.

If you go to http://www.exploratorium.edu/ronh/solar_system/ you'll find a really interesting calculator. It lets you pretend to scale down the solar system... like if you wanted to pretend the sun was the diameter of a mandarine orange, let's say. (about three inches). The program scales the rest of the planet sizes, distances, etc. and also scales down the speed of light, and the distances to all the other nearby stars, including the closest one, which is Alpha Centauri.

In real life, this star (actually a group of three stars orbiting each other, the closest of which is actually called Prima Centauri) is about four and a half light years away.

That's really hard to picture in your head. I can't even convert it to miles without that annoyng +E thingy on the calculator. (I never did understand what that +E thingy is supposed to mean.) After some web searching I found the answer in real numbers. It's approximately 24,792,710,570,269,624 miles away. Yes that's almost twenty five quadrillion miles.

But try to picture that.

You can't. So keep reading.

The sun in real life is 862,400 miles across, or about 2.7 million miles around if you wanted to drive your melting car around it. So that's the sun.

The earth is 7901 miles in diameter. Or about 24,901 miles in circumference. It'd be some kind of cool, James Bond boat car.

The Sun and Earth are at least 91 million miles from each other. (This distance increases during the year, but who cares.)

Okay, so got that pictured in your head? Of course you don't. I don't either. So let's use the calculator...

If I made a model of the solar sytem and used a mandarine orange as the sun, the earth would be very teeny. Half a millimeter. Maybe the size of a grain of sugar. Then the distance from us to the sun would be 26 feet. That's easier to picture. An orange, a grain of sugar, and the length of your house. (pluto, by the way, would be 1062 feet away from the orange, and would be practically invisible to the naked eye, that's if it were still a planet. Poor Pluto.)

Okay, got that? I do. Next we want to figure out how far away the nearest star would be. Perhaps there's a chance this star has planets, maybe one with life. Not likely, since there are a hundred billion other, vastly more distant stars in our galaxy alone. (A galaxy, by the way, is one of those disk things that looks like a hurricane cloud. We live in one called the Milky Way. Galaxies look fuzzy like smoke. The fuzzy smokey stuff is stars. There are hundreds of billions of other galaxies in the rest of space that we can detect; the universe.)

Got that? Ok. A very large disk thing (the Milky way, about 12 million miles across even at this scale, where in a teeny corner there exists...), an orange (the sun), and a grain of sugar (our planet Earth) circling it about 26 feet away.

Now just take a moment and try to imagine spotting this grain of sugar even from a few feet away. Maybe pretend you're planet hunting. Okay, now let's move on.

So one would think that given the huge number of stars in our disk thing (galaxy) we would be bumping into stars all the time... or at least running into UFO's from all the jillions of planets that must be out there. But here's the thing:

I was talking earlier about that closest star from us (actually 3 orbiting each other) Alpha Centauri, and how far away it is, right? The closest star. The one that you'd try first if you were flying around looking for more sugar planets.

It's really far away. Remember? Twenty five quadrillion miles. But how far away is it when you scale things down?

Much closer. If the Earth were the size of a grain of sugar, the nearest star would be only 1374.1 miles away. Piece of cake. Like from Toronto to Miami. (actually Toronto to Miami is 1237 miles, but close enough) I can imagine doing that trip in a few days in the car.

So here's the rub. Now we have to consider how fast you can fly. What's the fastest possible speed according to physics? It's the speed of light. That's not a rumour, it's a fact. (actually a theory, but a theory isn't merely a guess like most people commonly use the word in everyday English. Not when it comes to science. Not even close. The speed of light as a universal speed limit is part of the General Theory of Relativity, which has been tested and proved correct by experiments, and in fact GPS locators count on this theory or you'd never find your way to Miami)

The Speed of light. That's it. Nothing can travel faster than that. (Well you could in a sense, but let's put it this way, if you travelled that fast, time outside the space ship would speed (or put another way, time inside the ship would slow down) up to such a point that you would greet infinity and probably witness the end of the universe. Not only that, your ship would become as flat as a CD, though you and it would still function perfectly. Einstein understood it, I don't really, but go read about it if you like. It's amazing and strains the edges of your brain. And that's without the math, which I understand none of, as you probably believe when you think about me and calculators.) So you can't fly that fast without disappearing into the ends of time and turning into a pancake. Nothing can.

But even if you could...

The speed of light isn't really all that fast when you scale things down. If the Sun were the size of an orange, a beam of light would radiate outward from it at only 1/2 an inch per second. Do that with your finger. Try flying from one end of your computer keyboard to the other end at 1/2 an inch per second. On my little laptop keyboard it took about 23 seconds. (try counting one one thousand... two one thousand... as your finger crosses about an inch) Now how far is it from the Sun to the Earth at this scale again? Oh yeah, about 26 feet. The length of your house. Do you have to patience to try that? I don't but I know how long it would take you. It would take you the same amount of time it takes in real life for light to reach us from the sun. It's about 8 minutes. Try it with the finger test, I dare you. Remember your finger is travelling at the speed of light. Which isn't possible. You have an amazing finger. (and if you think that's odd, how about the fact that when you look at the sun you're seeing 8 minutes into the past)

Okay. So the next thing is this: How far away is the nearest star? How far would you have to drag your finger to get there? Oh yeah... I remember. Miami. You'd have to drag your finger to miami at 1/2 inch per second.

It would take you 4.2 years.

That's If you could travel at the speed of light, which you can't, without a bunch of weird Einstein stuff happening. End of the universe and all that.

But even if we pulled it off...

we would be looking for grains of sugar. In the dark. Without a map or GPS. And when you found a grain of sugar there would be no life there, so you'd move on to the next star which is...

in Hawaii. Or Australia...

And those are the close ones. There aren't very many. Most are hundreds or thousands or millions of times farther away. So that's the thing. A lot of work to find another Orange and maybe a grain of sugar.

So if you are a betting person, the best chance is that are our little blue grain of sugar will remain unnoticed, circling our little yellow orange for the rest of its days, until, finally, one day, billions of years from now, it will expand to the size of a house, and swallow us up, and you can call me Sunny D.

Sweet.

Faker's Dozen

2006-10-17T19:11:00.000-04:00

Okay Gary. I'm writing something. I loved the way you put it about how long it's been since I've blogged. Blogged. Think about that word for a minute. Okay now stop thinking about it. Never think about it again.

It's been so long I had to really think to remember my blogger username and password. Want to know what it is? Maybe you can blog for me.

Anyway after leaving work today I took a detour to the nasty little pawn shop next to my local grocery store. I really hate this place, but they do have great deals sometimes, and I had a specific thing I wanted to buy as a gift for somebody. They didn't have what I wanted, but they did have... dum da dum.... LBM.

LBM is the owner, or at least he presents himself that way. He's a Loud Balding Man (not that there's anything wrong with that) with a very loud voice. I understand him completely. More than he understands himself, I think. Not because I'm like him, but because it's so obvious. First and foremost I think he's probably gay, but in denial of it. (not that there's anything wrong with that) He speaks with a much louder voice than is necessary. I'll give you an example:

Camera does a slow pan of a shabby pawn shop. The camera stops on a Loud Balding Man with a permanent smirk fused to his face. A customer walks past, and, after unavoidably locking eyes with the Loud Balding Man lets out a less than enthusiastic greeting.

---Customer---

Hello.

---Loud Balding Man---

: HIIIIIII THEEEEEERE!!!!

The Customer does a double take, and keeps walking. Fade to white.

Do you see? He just doesn't need to talk that loudly. I think it's to cover up his homosexual nature and inflict a more manly image of himself on the world. I also think he's afraid of people. This is another reason he speaks so loudly and gets his face directly in front of yours as he says whatever he's going to say... too loudly.

I purchased a very cheap little camera that I knew had an incredibly close "macro" setting at aobut 1/3 its actual value. As he was putting it in the box for me I asked about a very nice watch in the glass case. I asked how much it was. It was a Jag. LBM replied, "TWELVE!!!!"

The thoughts in my head went something like, 'Twelve? Twelve what? Twelve shillings? Twelve dead babies? Twelve o'clock according to the watch? Twelve little numbers and a minute hand? Twelve what?'

Presently it became clear (by the ginger way he was handling it and the absurd price sticker) that he meant Twelve hundred dollars. Yeah. Right.

No Thanks, I said. Nice watch though, I said. It was. But it was used. Used means I don't want to pay twelve.

He continued to wrap up my camera and decided to become preoccupied by the teenagers looking around the shop. These teenagers had hoods and this didn't please LBM. He wanted them to remove their hoods and told me so. He also told me they'd be photographed both on the way IN and on the way OUT. Teenagers didn't please LBM. I was wondering if it was because he wanted to fondle their privates. Who knows, and who am I to judge.

Anyway, I'll be ending this now. Just wanted to say hello and tell you that I'll be back writing some more, soon.

In about Twelve.

Digressions and Podcastinations

2006-07-30T09:23:00.000-04:00

This is my Coronation Street morning. My co-workers laugh at me because I'm such an old lady with my Coro fanaticism. But it's one of those comfort things that I'd be hard pressed to do without. It usually starts with a nice cup of strong coffee (see "coffee in the marnin") and a ciggy while I answer some emails and maybe write in the blog. Then when I'm good and caffeinated I sit down in my nice, big, luxurious, brown-leather couch (the only nice thing I really had the heart to take with me from Calgary. I didn't want the kids to do without any of the stuff they'd gotten used to, plus I don't think I actually owned much more than that) and click the several hundred buttons it takes to get a TV working these days. Funny how that has not gotten simpler with the modern wonders of technology. It seems like I need about five remote controls just to turn on the CBC. But I digress...

I'm glad I have Coronation Street today, because this is also Chub Creek day. Because I'm a hopeless procrastinator I usuallly save doing the show for last thing Sunday night, but sometimes if I'm ambitious I might start it earlier. But Coronation Street gives me a reason to delay doing Chub Creek for a couple of guilt-free hours while I immerse myself in the Weatherfield goodness the show always offers. Why do I want to delay doing the show so much?

It's because this will be a difficult one. I can't say much about why, but this will be one of the most difficult shows I've ever done and I really don't want it to start or end. Maybe you can guess why. But if you're reading this Monday or later you'll already understand. I've even begun scribbling on my chalkboard some ideas for the show so it's a bit easier for me when I get down to it. It's amazing how emotions come into play during the silliest things, but it's also amazing how those silly things sometimes become the most important things.

So I'm going to refill my coffee now and maybe have another ciggy and just savour that little bit of morning that I love just before I start watching Coro. I hope this is a good one. I might even treat myself to some bacon and eggs the way they love to go on about eating on the show. They always seem to be eating bacon "butties" and quaffing gallons of tea and ale. I think they've cut down on the smoking lately for political reasons, so there's that. But watching them eat and drink all that stuff makes me want to smoke even more.

But I digress again...

Now where are those five remotes?

Without a Tracy

2006-07-22T03:06:00.000-04:00

It's 3:03 am. I'm jet lagging and don't want to go to bed. Just ordered a meat laden pizza, in fact. These days they don't give you any food on Canadian flights, even ones across the entire country. I'm writing because all of this reminded me of something that happened on the last leg of the flight. I was sitting there on the (stinking, cramped, too-small, no-food-serving) plane, on the final approach to Toronto's Pearson International Airport, when I noticed a woman about four seats ahead and on the other side. She was blonde, and I could only see her profile, but the more I looked at her (she was talking to somebody across the aisle, which is why I was seeing her in profile) the more I became convinced it was Tracy — An old flame.

Tracy was a very hot flame. She was somebody that I've been secretly wishing I'd bump into somewhere for many years now, and who I have completely lost track of since we split about twelve years ago. And there she was. Two seats ahead, talking to somebody across the aisle. The last time I saw her I was sitting in her car, telling her that I was seeing somebody else now and that she'd have to stop trying to get into my pants. If I could only have such problems anymore...

She had left me for some guy who owned a ranch. Tracy had a thing for cowboys and country music, neither of which would bring me to mind if you knew me very well. But I had accepted this and moved on to a new relationship. Funny how moving on can sometimes cause people to find you interesting again. Yes, Tracy wasn't interested in the cowboy anymore and was constantly finding ways to bump into me and made it plain she was interested in stirring things up again. But no, when this happened I told her in no uncertain terms that it was over and I had to be loyal to my new girlfriend. That girlfriend proceeded to dump me for a lawyer about a year later, after moving across the country with her, but because I had moved across the country it brought many new opportunties for me which would eventually culminate in a new career, a new girlfriend and two beautiful children. All because I said no to Tracy.

Tracy, the one I was evidently still in love with, even now. It was my own personal soap opera.

These were the thoughts flowing through my mind then, sitting on the plane, looking at her face, her blonde hair, even hearing that familiar laugh. But then I heard her mention the word "husband" and "kids" and my heart sank a little. I even figured out who her husband was. He was sitting across the aisle from me. Good looking, (better looking than me) wearing a suit, being very kind to everybody around him. (he even tried to help me move my armrest out of the way when I found the seat too damned small.) Nice guy. Of course he was. Figures.

The plane landed and we stood up in anticipation of finally having freedom from the cramped plane. The husband remained seated so those around him could stand. Tracy stood as well but I couldn't see her anymore. I had already "let her go", again mentally, but determined that I would at least catch her eye while we waited for luggage in the airport. Maybe say hello. See if she remembered me and perhaps thought I still looked good despite the years and the pounds and the hair (loss).

I let her husband stand up in front of me and he took the opportunity to call to his wife: "Dana, the others are staying at the airport so we can just hop in a cab," he said. The woman who wasn't Tracy by any stretch of the imagination turned around and saw me looking at her. She held my eyes for a second and looked away just before I could do the same.

Dana.

Phew. I think. Pizza's here.

Eyebrow

2006-07-03T11:51:00.000-04:00

Okay, be honest. How many of you have seen that photo of me and are driving yourselves crazy wanting to pluck that long hair out of my eyebrow? And then, how many of those are dying to tear off that Biore strip and look at it? Just wondering.

Coffee in the Marnin'

2006-06-14T07:24:00.000-04:00

Oh, I really have nothing for you, but I thought you'd find it interesting what happens when Dave runs out of sugar. First of all I should explain how I make coffee because it's related to how I make coffee. I have have something called a Swiss Filter. Okay it may not be called that but it has the word "Swiss" in it, or maybe "Swedish". And it has two parts: one is the container that, um, contains the coffee (it has a fine screen at the bottom) and the other is a sleeve that fits into the first container and it presses down on the coffee a bit and has holes in the bottom. You place this whole contraption, complete with coffee grounds sandwiched between the two plastic halves, on top of a coffee cup. Just pour boiling water.

It works very well, and produces a quite acceptable, if single, cup of coffee. I like it strong, and you can make coffee so strong it wakes you up just touching the handle of your mug.

Of course this is the time I put sugar in and cream. That is, after the brewing has taken place. But I'm out of sugar, and all I have in the house is a big squeeze thing of honey. You may be saying "just buy some more sugar" but I am fully aware I won't remember to do that for quite a few months. So NOW what I do is pour the honey right on top of the coffee grounds, assemble the Swiss Filter, and presto! Pre-sweetened coffee. The only trouble is I have to rinse it out a lot better afterwards. Yes it's a bachelor thing.

I'm currently working on a way to get the cream in there too. Why bother with this? It's the stirring, of course. All that work of stirring the coffee is just within reach of being eliminated. But about adding cream to the filter: currently it cools down the boiling water too much and I get medeocre tasting coffee and a VERY big mess in the Swiss Filter. Hey... what about powdered coffee creamer?

Just have to go try something. (Senseo, eat your heart out)

Disconnected Dad

2006-06-01T17:58:00.000-04:00

I'm pretty well blown away. I did some whining on the show about some things in my life (my kids being thousands of miles away, and how much it hurts and how helpless I feel about it sometimes) and I knew people would write and be supportive. If I'm honest with myself I'll admit I hoped so and thought it would be helpful to getting it straight in my mind. But the true reason I talked about it was that I needed people to know what was buzzing in the background. I needed people to know that this thing was going on (which I'm sure I've glancingly mentioned before, but not the details so much) and that I hoped they didn't think I' was an awful person because of it. I know I'm not an awful person, but I don't feel good at all about the situation I (and really I alone) have created. It isn't a hollywood style, all-things-end-well kind of story. It's the kind of story that, if heard in person, would likely cause an awkward silence, and maybe some polite comments.

But what I got was overwhelming. The supportive comments and emails I've gotten have really made me back up and think about it all in a new way. I haven't finished thinking, and I'm not saying I've arrived at some new conclusion, but I've come much closer to feeling that everything can be okay in its own way, and that sometimes we are weaker than we expect ourselves to be and that even though it's not "okay" it's just the way it is.

I love my kids so much, and I have so many faults that I don't want to really think about it, but having the support of people who care, even though I don't feel I deserve it, has meant so much to me that I have trouble putting it into words. Somehow those are the times I always try to.

So I guess this is just me being bewildered, surprised, humbled, and very very thankful of the good nature of people.

I'm going to make sure I put in the maximum effort I'm able, to keep myself in the lives of my children. I know I haven't even started yet, but I'll figure it out.

Love to everybody.
Dave

Cup Boreds

2006-05-18T11:15:00.000-04:00

I really don't want to talk about this on the podcast because it's so depressing, but I have no problem making all of YOU suffer with me. You see, I decided that my crappy, white, melamine cupboards were making my kitchen look a little boring. The whole, white on white look of the kitchen is just not inspiring to me. I want to COOK... I want to CHOP and SAUTEÉ and FLAMBÉ! But in the white kitchen all I do is make microwave popcorn and fried eggs.

So I used the excuse of having a load of time on my hands (I'm on a 10 day holiday at home) to repaint the cupboards a nice, deep, rich, inspiring shade of chocolate brown. DARK chocolate. Like you'd shave over a slice of cheesecake. Yeah.

I unscrewed them all and began laying them about the place. (in the process being amazed at how MANY of them there are. I swear I counted fifty cupboards) Then I went to the Home Depot and bought the paint, some heavy duty primer, some foam (smooth) rollers, a tray, and some dropcloths. Having accomplished this I returned and set about getting into my grubby clothes and got to work.

After about four hours I had primed all the cupboards. In the process I had a suspicion that the foam rollers were just not fine enough and I may end up laying down paint that looks BUMPY. With nothing to do but wait I decided NOT to go back to the Home Depot and buy a superfine roller, but instead to play XBOX for a couple of hours.

Paint dry, I began laying down the lovely brown paint (Ralph Lauren Tilled Earth or some nonsense) and immediately discovered that 1. the paint was too thick to go on smoothly and 2. the roller was too rough to lay the paint down without bumps. At this point I had to decide whether to keep going, or go back to the store and get the right equipment, and maybe thin down the paint a little.

I kept going. Of course I did.

With all fifty cupboards painted the fresh deep brown colour I played XBOX for another few hours and went to bed. Then after a great following day tromping through the bushes with Gary in search of our lost youth (surrounded by frogs that were terrified of us due to long generations of passed-down tales of horror involving two boys on the farm that didn't mean any harm) and maybe some Morel Mushrooms, I returned home and began installing the (now dry) cupboards back onto the cabinets in the kitchen.

I'd completed most of this when I really paused and had a look.

They were all bumpy. Bad bumpy. Cheap paint-job bumpy. White-trash bumpy.

Ugh. What now? Do I just put up with it? What do I do? Where's my mommy? I decided to immediately play XBOX for a few hours and decide what I should do while blasting the enemy out of its hideouts in the trenches and forests of Ghost Recon. I really spent a long time trying to find a way to accept this awful paint job and just not worry about it, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't. I had to redo the whole thing. That meant getting a sander, some sandpaper, a better roller, and thinning down the paint.

It's now been two more days of my precious holiday and I'm still not done. In fact, I'm procrastinating. That's why this story is so long, you see? That's why this story is so loooong. I'm in no hurry to end it, in fact. I may as well just go on and on and on forever for all I care, because it's keeping me from doing what I know I have to continue doing.

Sanding... and sanding... and sanding... Fine. I'll just do a little more before I finish writing.

Okay I just finished the first cupboard with the better roller and thinner paint.

Hey, it looks pretty good.

Chatty

2006-05-04T00:34:00.000-04:00

I just noticed that our Frappr map now has a built in live chat. Whoohoooo! Now if only somebody were there besides me.

Let go

2006-05-02T23:00:00.000-04:00

I'm just laying in bed with my computer on the desk. The text looks sideways to me. I had another weird day. I don't want to get into details, but I've hit another crossroads, and this one has hit me in a whole bunch of ways. I've had to let something go today (mentally) that I didn't know I was hanging on to. I suppose I knew it deep down, but just not at the surface— I didn't know how tightly I was holding on to it. At first I was really sad and depressed about it, but then as time has passed today I've come to feel a kind of weight lifting. It's amazing how heavy something can feel, even something that you love. Sometimes it's okay just to let it go. I'm being vague, I know, but I think you can understand what I'm saying. The future is okay, I think. I'm almost looking forward to it. Nomatter how bad things seem to be, time has a way of washing the beach clean. But there's always a little sand left in your crack.

Last Minute

2006-04-29T18:55:00.000-04:00

Story of my life. I have a problem just doing things early before they become a problem. It's in this spirit that I went to the tax offices today and did my tax return. Today is the last possible day to do your taxes before the government begins to get annoyed with you and you have to pay penalties or some such hoopla. I had good reason, though, not to be eager this year. You see, when my company offered me this job, they threw in a lot of incentives, most of them large and taxable. I didn't realize how taxable until today, because I'm now going to have to pay so much tax that I, sort of, have no idea how I'm going to pay it all. Yes I'm talking thousands. Sigh.

I'd better not hit one single pot-hole on the way to work Monday.

Cigarettes and Bleach

2006-04-18T23:50:00.000-04:00

Just wanted to make my blog live up to its name, although simply not ever writing another entry would suffice. Anyway I'm cleaning up this dump so that Gary won't run screaming when he comes for a visit tomorrow night. We're going to hit the pub and partake of the Irish beer. But must clean first.

So I'm making use of my personal home cleaning product which I created myself, and which (when sprayed from a spray bottle) cleans better than anything I've ever bought. I will now name those ingredients:

1. Water
2. Dish soap
3. Bleach

Yes, that's right. No more will I ever purchase a bottle of crap for seven dollars that just smears the mess around a little. This stuff will nuke the dirt at the site. Were it not for my headphones and my iPod and Marvin Suicide blaring, I could surely hear the bacteria as I enter the bathroom as they scream in horror, "Nooooooooo! Not the 'special' mixture!!! AAAAAAHHHHHH" and then they die.

I sit now in satisfaction having nuked the bathroom (including the nasty looking plastic shower curtain, now gleaming in virginal transparency) smoking a cigarette. Oh, and yes the apartment now smells like cigarettes and bleach. Something like a janitor during breaktime.

Now I need to work on a replacement for "Febreeze" to get rid of the stink.

Rock Star meets Gravitational Tractor

2006-04-02T12:14:00.000-04:00

Now this is fascinating. As always, truth is much stranger than fiction. I was listening to an excellent podcast called "Nova Science Now" which was my original source for the news of the impending strike from a big rock in the year 2036, which has a high probablility of hitting us right in the middle of the Pacific ocean. The first question that comes to mind is, "So what is Nasa doing about it?" and the answer is nothing. Then the next question is "Well can't we just send some nukes and blow it up?" and the answer according to Nova is no. The nuke would likely just rearrange things, and there would be no way to be CERTAIN that the job is done, and the public needs certainty. So that's when the scientist being interviewed offered up his idea. And it was an idea that just shocked me with its simplicity.

As you all know, all large bodies attract each other due to gravity. It's the weakest force in the universe, but it's what holds us to this planet, and what holds the moon to Earth, and us and the rest of the planets to the Sun.

The idea is this: Send a small craft into space to rendezvous with the rock. Then instead of making tricky maneuvers and landing, and setting up a rocket to propel it away from us, you simply park it nearby in space, and stop it from falling. That's right, stop it from falling... onto the rock. With just a small amount of propellant, the craft can sit in a stationary orbit, stopping itself from falling onto the rock, and this action will pull the asteroid in the direction of the craft. Without touching it. It would have the same effect as if we shot a grappling hook down to it and started pulling. They call this a "gravitational tractor"

Who the hell could have thought of something so simple? The guy says we only have to change its VELOCITY by a few ten thousandths of a kilometer per hour over many years of tugging and it will miss.

Thank God for big brains. That rocks.

Writing

2006-04-02T11:45:00.000-04:00

I've found a very neat way of communicating with two of my friends in different parts of the world. One lives in Wales (knitting cold fusion researcher, Brenda Dayne) and one lives in Seattle (science fiction writer, and weaving madwoman Syne Mitchel) both are excellent writers, and it's always hilarious trying to keep up with their knitting-needle-sharp wit. We use Skype, which gives you the ability to keep a long conversation going between several people at once. All of us are night owls, and all of us have different time zones, so we often find ourselves together inexplicably. But even so, there are long periods where two of us might be having a conversation when the other is absent, but when I go to my computer I can read back.

It's really neat and I think I can foresee a little habit growing. Speaking of habits, a nun recently joined the Chub Creek listenership, and I found myself suddenly watching my language and that I didn't say anything too controvertial. Then I shook it off and realized that's likely not what anybody listening would want; an edited version of the Creek. I need Gary to come back and blow the doors off.

So I'm sitting here on a Sunday enjoying the nice, spring sunshine, a cup of very strong, sweet coffee with cream, and two hours of Coronation Street. Ah, life. Couldn't get much better. Soon I have to go check Skype and see if anything has happened since I've been away. We need a name for our little chat group... like "the Group of Seven". Except it's only three. Barely a group really... Any ideas. Do you care? "The Knit, Weave and Dink Trio". Okay I have too much time on my hands.

Have a great Sunday.

Currently Known

2006-03-24T21:42:00.000-05:00

Just watching the Brit awards. I TiVo'd it. Okay I didn't TiVo it because I have a cheaper, Canadian version of a TiVo. Should I be capitalizing it that way? I don't know really, it just seemed right. I'd be surprised if that's right. Why the hell did I capitalize it that way? Who knows, anyway on with what the hell I was going to say... what was it...

Oh yeah. Prince. He just performed on the Brit awards and did four songs. I really have to hand it to that little guy. He seems gay, but I don't think he is. He's the gayest not gay person I've ever seen. Anyway I think he's fantastic. He had an all girl band (except for the bass player; token male) playing with him, and they were so good live that I found myself really getting into the fact that they were female and so good. Why is that? Why should it make a differrence? Don't know. Hope you weren't looking for something profound there. They were hot, that's all I know. But the hottest of all was the drummer. I couldn't take my eyes off her. Then at the end of the last song (Let's go Crazy, one of my earliest rock solo guitar influences because it has this ROCKING guitar solo at the end using a crybaby wah pedal) he introduced her. It was Sheila E. Wow. I now want to go find every Sheila E. album ever made. Did she make more than one album? Who knows. She's hot, that's all I know. Great drummer too.

But what amazed me about Prince was how good he was live. His vocals were bang on (no he wasn't lipsynching, I have a very sensitive lip-synch detector) He does this falsetto vocal that cascades off into weird riffs and runs and goes right back into a scream or a softer vocal. Very cool. He was duet singing with one of his backup singers, sharing the same mic and he gave her what looked like an impromptu kiss on the cheek. I liked that. It was funny too, because the whole time she was staring at him like she was in love. I always wonder how much of that stuff is planned.

Anyway he's very short, and one of the presenters that came on later mentioned that he spotted Prince back stage sleeping in his shoe.

Cool.

Why Can't They Put the Beer Store on the Right?

2006-03-20T17:45:00.000-05:00

I mean, really! Don't they know I like to have a relaxing beer or two after a hard day's Monday? Sometimes I need a beer after work, and when I come home it's much more convenient to drop in to a store when it's on the right. Not the left. The left means you have to pull in, do an annoying left turn, get your stuff, do another annoying left turn, then continue on your way. It would be FAR easier to drop in to a nice Beer Store on the right, pull in, and pull out. No lights, no waiting. But noooooo I can't do that because there isn't anything on the right. Only the left. What's with that?? Come to think of it, I don't think there are any stores of any kind on the right. They're all on the left. It's some kind of conspiracy! Help me out here! I need my beer on the right. It's my right.

Rock Star

2006-03-16T23:39:00.000-05:00

Hey, did you guys know there's an asteroid the size of a stadium heading for Earth in 30 years? Cool. Doesn't even sound big, does it? But that's the charm with these pesky asteroids. They don't have to be big. You see, they don't even hit us. We bump into them. The Earth is moving around the sun at about 30,000 miles per hour, and when you smack into something at that speed, you smack good. Bullets only go a few hundred miles per hour. And there's none of this "whooosh.... trail of fire.... big plummeting asteroid as we watch in horror" stuff either. The atmosphere is only about 20 miles thick, so when something plows through it at 30,000 miles per hour or more (depending if it's moving toward or away from us) you don't get to see it coming. It's just BLAMMO.

Apparently it will do some pretty good damage too. Likely to land in the middle of the Pacific and cause tsunamis that make the recent disaster look like a playground pool. Neat what you miss in the news when it's full of hurricanes and Iraq. Anyway, NASA's not really doing anything about it just now. They're busy getting ready to land on the moon... again. Hm. Almost makes one question George W. Bush's priorities on several levels doesn't it? But don't worry, there's time to evacuate. But it'll be a shame losing all the property across the entire West coast of North America. Hey, I'm from Canada... maybe we can load up the Canadarm with some rockets and send it up there to push the asteroid away. Or maybe we can launch a Tim Horton's coffee shop and land it on the rock. The drive thru traffic might cause it to deflect. Oh I'm all out of ideas.

Have a nice day!

More eating

2006-03-08T17:41:00.000-05:00

The blog name speaks for itself, doesn't it? Yeah I know. I haven't felt like writing in a long time, and I still don't, but I'm hungry, and waiting for the food to be done so I can eat it.

I'm on another health kick, trying to cut out all the red meats and fatty foods. It's a real chore, and hard to come up with interesting things to much on. It doesn't help, either, that I get so ravenous when I get home from work... especially when I've been eating things only cows and bunny rabbits eat. Today though I have a pile of mixed vegetables and some cod fillets simmering in a pool of leek soup. I have no idea what it will taste like but right now even that sea monkey tank is looking tasty. It'd be like seafood broth with little wriggly bits. Mmmmmmm.

Hope y'all are doing fine. Me and my stomach have some work to do now. Growwwl.

Roast

2006-02-25T17:46:00.000-05:00

Today is Chub Creek day. It's the first time I've done a podcast of Chub Creek without Gary being there. I've planned something fairly elaborate, and I've put all this pressure on myself and have been given a load of content from generous people around the world for it. In my mind I was going to wake up early and get right into it, but when I woke today I just wasn't in the mood.

So I cleaned my apartment, I separated and repotted a basket of plants that were given to me by my parents when I moved in here, I ate some chips, I did some laundry.

I still wasn't in the mood.

Then I went grocery shopping and discovered I have a ton of "points" on my debit card that allowed me to get everything for free. That was cool. I went home and remembered that getting a load of groceries sucks when you live in a condo. I had about fifteen bags in one hand, a new roasting pan in the other, and my keys in my teeth.

I unloaded the groceries into the fridge, but I still wasn't into it. The pressure, the pressure.

Then I began preparing a huge roast beef dinner. It's in the oven now, and I'm sitting at my dining table enjoying a Pina Colada and a cigarette. Maybe when the smell of roast beef starts filling the room I'll be into it.

It's all very weird. Podcasting is bizarre. At least I'll have a nice dinner. Maybe I'll be too full and fall asleep and never get the thing done. Then again, maybe it will be the best episode I've done. It's odd not knowing. I was happy to learn that Gary has bought a house. What a strange two weeks for him. First a job, now this...

I feel like podcasting now. Wish me luck.

You won't believe this

2006-02-22T18:55:00.000-05:00

Okay, ready? 2 cups peanut butter. 1 cup sugar. 2 eggs. Blend and bake. That's it! No flour, no baking soda, no nonsense. Best you've ever tried, I promise.

LARP

2006-02-18T19:04:00.000-05:00

This time I typed in "LARP" in the Google image search. Sorry if you're looking for heavier content, wait untill I'm not on holiday. "LARP" is an acronym for "Live Action Role Play" which I like to make fun of every once in a while. It's essentially Dungeons and Dragons but instead of being played huddling around a dark table with dice and the imagination, it's played live. You dress up in your favourite character costume and run around throwing pencils at each other shouting "lightning bolt!". (See the soundseeing tour at the end of Chub Creek episode 40 revisited for more on this) The fellow here in the bird suit is a good example. I especially like the magic marker feathers.

Really I shouldn't make fun. It has occured to me before that all of this blogging stuff, and even more so, podcasting hold many parallels to this type of fantasy where a whole world is created and each player holds a certain heirarchy within it. For example, you may think of Adam Curry as the Aragorn of the land of Pod. Or maybe you might paint him as Sauron. Depends on your point of view. (Adam Curry helped create the podcasting phenomenon as well as much of the culture that ensued). Gary and Myself are something like Hobbits, trying to find our way through a dark world where it's difficult to get any attention. Brenda Dayne of Cast-On is Galadriel. Powerful, yet humble, with thousands of knitting wood-eleves at her command. P.W. Fenton is TreeBeard the Ent, while Michael Butler is Tom Bombadill, loveable, timeless, ever prancing through the forest, oblivious to the current comings and goings of the world, but never tiring of the music playing in his own mind. Gandalf would have to be Ted Reicken of Island Podcasting, with the less stable Sauruman being played by Scarborough Dude from the Dicks n Janes Podcast.

Okay I got off base there, and I didn't mention many of my favourite shows, but podcasts do have a sort of heirarchy, and when you first get into it you have this illusion that the world you have entered cares about you or even loves you. What you soon find out is that the podosphere is populated mostly with orcs, always mewling in their basements with inferior microphones, bad jokes, and worse music, suffering from delusions of grandeur. There isn't much separating the Hobbits from the Orcs.

Why is my optical mouse shining with a faint blue glow?

Noob

2006-02-17T20:09:00.000-05:00

It's just fun to click on a google image search and see what comes up. In my case it was this fellow. I have no idea who he is, but I like him.

Don't you hate it when you haven't written in your blog for a few days? Damn that pressure, eh? There, I used "eh" in a sentence. I wonder what the correct word is that would substitute for "eh" in that sentence. I guess the only possible answer is: "wouldn't you say?". That's lame. Who says that? Nobody, that's who. That's why we Canadians are so smart, eh?

Just listening to Cast-On (at www.cast-on.com) a podcast for knitters, and man, she must have something great going there because I know nothing about knitting and have no interest in it whatsoever, yet I find the show so good. (I'd better be careful here, because I believe Brenda Dayne's partner reads this blog) But really... I don't even like sweaters. They're itchy, and they bug my neck. I don't even like toques, because I have a 24.5 inch head that defies all forms of head gear. But if you are a knitter, please let me know and I'll send you my address. I would ideally like my toque to read "DINK" at the front. Or maybe "Chub Creek" or maybe "Chub Creek" on the front and "DINK" on the back. Actually that might be a bad idea, because it has come to my attention that our favourite slang for "penis" also means somemthing racist having to do with Vietnamese soldiers. That was absolutely not our intention for it to be interpreted in that way, but I'd hate to think what might happen were somebody from anywhere near Vietnam walking behind me while wearing my toque.

I have no idea how I got onto that subject. You know, podcasting has allowed me to become much more relaxed about blogging. It's because before I was a podcaster I was under the illusion that masses of people might read the entries, and therefore I must make sure something worth reading is always available here. Of course, now I know that's nonsense, and I would have a bigger audience in a public elevator should I ever decide to enlighten its occupants with my meanderings of my big head.

Can't think of a way to wrap this up yet, so I guess I'll keep going. Do you agree that there's an annoyance point in blogs where you realize that the one you're reading is just long enough to cross the threshold of it being "work" rather than "fun" reading it? No? Okay, well it wasn't your blog I was referring to then.

Have a great evening. Chinese food's on the way. I hope I don't eat anything gross this time (see Egg Foo Yuk). And please don't think I'm on some sort of anti-Asian kick, because I'm not. Oh brother, I'd better quit while I'm ahead. Actually this Chinese food is the best on earth, because it has a Thai influence. There's a salt and pepper squid which is to die for.

Okay I think I've crossed the threshold. Bye.

Matters of the Heart

2006-02-12T13:49:00.000-05:00

Walking through a major mall during the Valentine's Day season has gives me heart palpitations, and not the good kind. Being involved in the graphic design business, I participate in the hype myself, creating images that help sell the whole ideal. But being single gives me clarity of thought that I haven't had in recent memory. I haven't been single for this long a span since I was eighteen, and all the lovey dovey imagery takes on a new, thin, over-hyped, insincere tone.

It isn't really that I don't believe in the spirit of giving your sweetheart something special during this time, but even when I was attached I did slightly resent being forced into spending money on something trite and typical. My style was more in the area of giving when I felt like it, and when I wanted my loved one to feel... loved. And I can hold my head high and say that those times happened a lot. But having been free from those feelings for quite a few months now I see it all with even more skepticism. Walking through the huge mall today I can see poor schmucks racing around the girlie boutiques, frantically trying to empty their wallets for the girlfriend or the wife. What a waste it all is. What good is a dozen roses or a box of chocolates on a day when it's expected of you? Is that romance? I think most people wouldn't know romance if it jumped up and bit them on the sinoatrial node. That dozen roses is all part of a machine, one that I can see very clearly these days, and one which I don't much like. I'd rather unplug the entire machine and have people get real about themselves and their relationships. A dozen wilting roses does not buy you love, or sex, or marriage.

One time in my life I recieved a bunch of roses from a girlfriend. I have to say it did feel nice, and I can understand the appeal, but if it happened to me every year at about the same time I would not hold much for me. Give me a hug, maybe a kiss, tell me you love me. Or even help fold my laundry. That's good for me. I do not heart folding laundry.

Egg Foo Yuk

2006-02-10T18:20:00.000-05:00

Yes, more about food. I had a really cool free sampling of food from work (that I'm not allowed to talk about) that is coming to shelves soon. I loved it, and it was something I'd probably buy. The only problem is it wasn't enough food for my pig of an apetite. To cure this, I dug back into the fridge and microwaved a plate of chinese food that had been in there for a couple of days.

I was reading Gary's blog, eating my noodles and pieces of chicken and snow peas, very interested in his fireflies article, when an overpoweringly awful taste (and smell!) coursed through my senses. I had bitten down on something soft (seemed like just another piece of chicken) and swallowed it before I became aware of the taste. It was like I had bitten down on a little turd, and though I have no idea what a turd might taste like, the smell and taste of it all seemed to fit the description. What bothered me so much was that I just instictively swallowed without even thinking of spitting it out. I feel violated... abused... disgusted...

Anyway I have to finish my plate of food. I'm still hungry. I'll let you know if I get violently ill.

Pops!

2006-02-09T22:11:00.000-05:00

Just have a bowl. I'm telling you, no matter what mood you're in, if you're grumpy, if you're sad, if you think you're hungry but everything else sucks, if you're quitting smoking and you have that awful, intangible craving that's driving you nuts... have a bowl of pops. They're so good. Just needed to tell you that. I'm having another bowl...

Oh, and another thing. Look at that picture for a minute. I think it's pretty old, wouldn't you say? Yes I think so. Anyway, what the hell are those blobs of white all over the cereal? Either the milk they used was a little old, or somebody got a little too excited about their corn pops.

I'm having another bowl...

Just adding another paragraph here. I just was looking at that picture again and I think that cowboy looks like he's from Deliverance. Pants a lit-tle tight.

Fuck I'm sick of these Corn Pops...

Maybe it's this guy.

2006-02-08T00:05:00.000-05:00

What bugs me about the word "blog" is the stereotypical geek humour associated with it. Have you ever met a computer programmer? I don't mean somebody who dabbles in coding HTML or something. I mean hard-core. Somebody who lives for the language of the machine. Have you ever met one of those guys? (or gals, for that matter.) They would find the word "blog" hilarious. Just funny as "all get out". Why? Because it's an ugly word that rolls off the tongue as gracefully as "globule" or "pustular gangrene" or "realigning the warp coils". Computer programmers love that shit. Sure, as in everything, there are likely many exceptions, but I'm talking about hard-core, stay up all night coding the next incarnation of Windows XP server software, LARP playing, wit-meisters who gleefully spout such terms as "lamer", and type such unbearable acronyms as "LMAOROTF"

I can just imagine the hilarity that ensued after the aforementioned first made the connection: "web log... web log... weblog... blog... BLOG! hahahahahahahhaa. BLOG. BLOG. BLOG. it's like my alien character's name in Baldur's Gate!"

Of course, now we're stuck with it. Thanks a lot. Lightning bolt!

The Circle

2006-02-06T19:22:00.000-05:00

I somehow feel like it's inappropriate for me to dwell on something so silly when something so serious is happening for Gary. But he's got that under way, and he'll be fine. He's got "get-up-and-go" like nobody I've ever met. But inappropriate or not, I keep coming back to the Creek in my mind and the fun we've had and the enormous boost to our friendship our little podcast has become. We'll do our one year show I think, whetherr or not Gary finds the time to do it with me, and then I just don't know.

Chub Creek for me, as I said during the first episode, has always really been something I did for myself and for Gary. But only now do I realize how much I mean that. It's for my pal, and the fun and excitement of sharing each show with each other before we release it to the public has been my favourite part of each week for a year now. It's not easy to let go of something you look forward to every week.

So I find myself wondering what next. When I say Chub Creek was also for me, I mean that during these tough times it has been a very sturdy shoulder for me to lean on when there was nothing else there. And it was perfect for that. I'll miss it. I'll miss talking into that mic knowing Gary will be helping me finish it and sharing it with me. This is all very sappy, and very odd so some people maybe, but I feel like I've lost something that can never be replaced with anything else.

But I realize that Gary will need a friend now more than ever, and that for some people out there in the world that's exactly what Chub Creek is; a friend. Two friends. Best friends. But even though it's only me, I think I have to find a way to keep it going so that Gary has a friend for those times he needs one. When I left my family gary recorded a "garecast" for me to play on the plane, and honestly, I don't know how I'd have held it together without that.

So I'm going to continue on with Chub Creek, though I'll find it awkward using the name and the theme song. Not sure about all that, but I'll keep it going for my buddy.

I feel like this should have a violin playing underneath it. Ha ha. Give me a break.

Horizontal Blogging

2006-02-01T00:23:00.000-05:00

Tired. Just lay down to sleep and my laptop was still glaring at me. I'm now reaching over and typing these words. Have you ever heard of anything more ridiculous in your life. There had better be a spelling error or two or I'm well beyond the realm of total geeksom. My head is resting on my pillow so it looks like I'm typing in Cantonese with the words flowing from top to bottom. Well happy Chinese New Year. Nite nite.

Casting for Gerbils

2006-01-30T19:28:00.000-05:00

I really enjoyed working on Chub Creek 43 - Don't freeze the iRiver or the Gerbils with Gary this weekend. What a lot of bloody work it is though. I always get the feeling we've gone too far and taken up too muhc of our lives doing the show and even worse, that Gary is going to one day say, "Dave, I've had enough of this shit. It's too much work". But that day hasn't come for some reason and I'm very grateful for that.

Chub Creek has provided me (and I dare say gary) with so much pure joy and satisfaction that at this point I really can't imagine life without it. Does that surprise anybody? Do you have the same experiences with your podcasts? If you have no idea what I'm talking about click the link above and have a listen to what happens when two guys who know each other really well and who happen to have a lot of stupid crap in common put their heads together for a weekend. It was really fun.

I did end up with a rehash of the old regret I used to feel for all the old crazy times we had when Gary and I were kids. Growing up together on the farm was a lot of fun, but it was hell on the local wildlife. Frogs, bugs, fish, groundhogs, even gerbils had to deal with the horrifying experiments Gary and I had in store. Those were the days of laughter and feelings of being carefree. We had so much fun, but we were so cruel to the little, helpless creatures of our world. I still feel that even though I regret it all now and that I've more than made up for my bad Karma in my adult life, mother nature will have the last laugh. Ah well. Enjoy life while it's here, and be kind to the animals.

Comments

2006-01-29T12:26:00.000-05:00

If anybody can tell me how to edit the code on this blog so that that stupid "hidden" comments link stops being hidden I'd appreciate it. I can't figure out how to make it go away. If you don't know what I mean try moving your cursor over the number beside the title of each post and the word "comment" appears. All it really serves to do is ensure nobody knows there is a comments link. But there is one. Honest. It's an inVIIIIIsible comments link.

Gandalf hits the Street

2006-01-29T11:58:00.000-05:00

To hardcore Coronation Street fans, this isn't really news, but for the rest of you it's probably worth a laugh. Ian Mckellan, who played Gandalf in the Peter Jackson feature films, the Lord of the Rings, has joined Coronation Street for a few episodes. His part is very funny. He plays a famous writer who has come to the dreaded "writer's block" part of his career. To help this, he claims he's come to the Weatherfield area to absorb the struggle of the working man and get in touch with his roots so he may finish his masterpiece, "The Canary's Last Song". In each episode he digs deeper and deeper into the hearts (and pockets) of the bookish Coronation Street characters, such as Norris, Emily, Rita and several others. His dialog is very funny, and reminds you of the way he spoke in LOTR, with those flourishes of grand, Middle Earth dialect, only while wearing thick, seventies style glasses and an old cordeuroy jacket. But instead of warnings about dark times and soliloquies of inspirational breadth, this time he speaks "snob" and quotes elaborate lines of literature in the most mundane of settings. Ken, the most bookish of all the Street characters sees through all this right away, and in the end exposes him as the con artist he is. Very funny stuff, and worth catching in the re-runs if you can.

Gandalf was by far my favourite character in LOTR, and Ian played him flawlessly. In fact I'd go so far as to say he seemed to lift Gandalf directly from the pages of the books. Truly it was wonderful to watch on the big screen and afterward I felt like I had just spent three hours visiting an old friend. It was good to see old Gandalf having a little fun with my other friends on Coronation Street. Here's to you, Ian the white.

Knit not (about knitting)

2006-01-28T12:40:00.000-05:00

You know there's one thing I love to talk about, and that thing is knitting. Oh, if I could have a few hours in front of an audience just to talk about what I'm really, truly passionate about, I'd wear out the microphone. Have you ever spent a day where all you wanted to do is knit and knit and knit? Me too. If only I could have a dollar for every hour I've spent with those pointy needles whizzing amongst each other so fast smoke began to waft from them. Of couse I'm joking and I know absolutely nothing about knitting. But could somebody please knit me a toque? My head is so big that I just can't find one that fits. Also after watching Brenda Dayne's Cast-On podcast for knitters rocket up the charts, I thought maybe I could get some of that action for this blog... I think that calls for a sheepish grin.

Eggs

2006-01-28T10:32:00.000-05:00

Eggs are so good. Do you like them? For some reason I just can't wake up during a weekday early enough to make myself a good breakfast, and somehow I think that if I could, and if I made myself a nice breakfast with eggs, it would make all the difference.

For Christmas I received from Kathy's mom a very neat little plastic device that allows you to crack an egg in it, and cook it in the microwave in thirty seconds. Thirty seconds!! I think that's pretty hilarious. Put that together with Schneider's bacon that's ready in five seconds, some instant coffee, and you've got yourself a meal. That would be one time you'd really be pissed off how slow your toater really is.

Anyway on Monday I'll be trying this out with the last two or so minutes I have before I'm running out the door. Wish me yolk. Okay that doesn't really work.

Addinkt

2006-01-27T22:44:00.000-05:00

I'd forgotton how addictive blogging is. One thing I love to do is put stupid photos in a blog. I have a collection of crazy creatures that washed up on the shore after that mega psu.. sue... pess.. pssu... tidal wave. It was tragic and horrific and all that, but after all that had sunk in these photos surfaced. They were photos of creatures that became beached when the water all went away. Some freaky things swim in the oceans, and this one with the sad eyes is the oddest living thing I think I've ever seen. Aaaanyway... haha. I've decided I'm going to be saying haha in these blogs just the same way I do when I'm chatting with Gary. There's something about using a chuckle in conversational writing. Nothing else puts across the same image. At least nothing in my gargantuan grasp of the English language.

ha ha.

Eye don't know

2006-01-27T21:30:00.000-05:00

I'm sitting here listening to my favourite podcast, Marvin Suicide. I've already used up the recent episodes, so to get my fix I've gone back and downloaded a whole whack of the old stuff. I've never done that before and I'm not sure why. I've talked about that on the show before, but never quite nailed exactly what it is that stops us from wanting to hear old podcasts, even ones we love. I have a feeling it's something to do with a sad feeling you get listening to something that has long past. At least that's the way EYE see it. Sorry I just wanted to put this picure in there of my eyeball and couldn't think of a segue.

How the hell do you spell segue anyway? Is it segue or segway. I think segway is that bike with only two wheels. I'm really writing stream of consciousness right now because I want enough text to wrap cooly around that photo. I hope you're enjoying this effect. It really is costing me stress though, because I work in constant worry that my iMac will just shut off, as it has been doing for quite a while now and that would really piss me of if it happened right in the middle of my

Nother

2006-01-20T19:46:00.000-05:00

Just wondering how badly I've screwed up this template

Better Days

2006-01-19T21:48:00.000-05:00

Time to start writing again. I haven't written just for myself in a very longe time if ever, and I'm not sure I'm capable of it at all, really, but I'd like to give it a try. Okay let's do the "try the template out" thing and get this fine tuned. Blogger is pretty simple.